It is sorrow that teaches

At one time, I was Catholic; but I no longer consider myself a Catholic. Once upon a time, I was not only Catholic, I wanted to be a nun. I believed then, and I believe now, the very best a person can aspire to be, is to be of service to his fellow man. The girl I once was is within me still, a precious, naive girl whose memories yet remain. It is this naive hopeful girl within me who cries, who mourns, and who fears how much more there is to lose. My sorrows and fears are bridges that must be crossed. My sorrows and fears are merely artifacts; evidence of the girl I once was.

I now cling to the possibility that there may be reason to hope. What that reason may be, I've no notion at all. Whatever the reason may be, the belief that it may be revealed to me enables me to cling to a possibility with tenacity borne of a visceral, innate need, although I am filled with fear.  I know it is sorrow that allows me to feel anything at all; it is sorrow for what was; it is sorrow for what is; it is sorrow for what will be.

It is sorrow that allows hope to abide and honors the naive hopeful girl whose memories still remain with me.

It is sorrow that teaches:  

“When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, 

and you shall see that in truth you are weeping 

for that which has been your delight.” 

Kahlil Gibran

photo credit: Alessandro Cancian

first posted on December 24, 2012