until we meet again...R.I.P. John McCarthy

May the roads rise to meet you. May the wind be at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face; The rain fall soft upon your fields And, until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of His hand. 
A GAELIC BLESSING

My friend John McCarthy passed away day before yesterday, and his funeral is today---and it's difficult to express the sense of loss I feel. More accurately, it's difficult to verbally express my sense of loss.  So, I will simply say, I am and will forever be grateful for having had the pleasure of having met John online.  

John helped me get through a time when I was terrified--so afraid, I couldn't close my eyes.  

I'm going to miss him...

the normality of madness John McCarthy

I would be so careful of the potential damage caused when we buy into the phrase "mental Illness" as if it is a disease of the brain. I have had 4 different diagnoises in my life when I woke up to the fact i had never had a test of any kind to confirm those guesses around my behaviour. I would love to hear from any of you who has undergone any type of medical test to confirm diagnoise to my knowledge NO such test exists and until the THEORY of chemical imbalance can be scientifically proved we really should be careful of buying into the whole medical model.

I lost my ability to unselfishly love ME. My spirit and my ability to challange life deserted me . When I stopped fighting the normality of madness and honored (it) as a part of who I am I found peace. Life is a beautiful thing, madness brings great gifts, and despair. But to fight madness, to try drive it out that is a fight you will loose.

So I sat with madness found peace through the breath with madness I so love life now write poetry now hold my family ever expanding grew a ponytail at 55. I am different more at peace, more in love, more loving of myself as a unique person.

I walked away from those who said I was diseased in my brain that I had an illness. My emotional self was suffering I put an end to that suffering with love. Check us out at MadPride Ireland

We are not ill ladies and gents we are gifted we simply get no help to recognise our gift we are informed it is a "mental illness" do not buy into the words!!

via Cork Independent:

John and his wife, Liz photo by Billy MacGill
Editorial Posted on 11/01/2012 y Deirdre O'Shaughnessy @deshocks

“The world won’t be as much fun now that he’s left it.”

A user of the website Broadsheet made this comment when the site marked John’s death yesterday, and I can’t say it better.

John was a campaigner, a pugilist, a debater, a temporary politician, a poet and a rogue, but it was his fun that made him shine.

He had none of the hang-ups that the rest of us have, and it made him extraordinary.

The last time we met was in the new Marymount Hospice at Curraheen, where he had gone for respite. It was the best night out I ever had in a hospice. 

We made Singapore Slings in plastic cups with glacé cherries, laughed, and argued. 

He knew he hadn’t long left, and he was full of sage advice. Never one to beat around the bush, John asked my partner and I whether we loved each other, and if we had a good sex life, saying that nothing else really matters.  

He was like that. 

John adored his lovely wife Liz with the ardent passion of a teenager. He loved life with the same passion, and his death makes the world a little darker for those who knew him, even if it was just through this newspaper or his frequent radio appearances.

His writing was a beacon for those in pain, and his raw honesty about so many things was refreshing in a world of spin and cynicism.

My last communication with him was a text I sent him the morning he died, asking if he’d heard about Mary Raftery and would he like to write about her for his column this week. 

John and Mary Raftery worked together on ‘Behind the Walls’, the documentary that focused on the horrors of our mental health system, past and present.

Both were fearless campaigners with a sense of justice and fairness that is rare. Both stood up for people who had nobody else, who were ignored or who just needed someone with a loudspeaker to shout, “This is not right”.

The loss of John McCarthy will be felt by a great many people. His family has lost a wonderful husband, son, father, grandfather, and brother, and his friends have lost a counsellor, an advisor, and a drinking buddy. 

But those represented by Mad Pride have lost a fearless advocate, an unquestioning giver of support and love, and someone who understood that being mad is normal and human. 

That’s why we called John’s column The Human Condition; because John understood the pain and joy of being human better than anybody I have ever met. He knew about despair and about great love, and his life was one lived to the full in every possible sense.

John was not one for prayers, but there will be thousands of people worldwide thinking of him and sending their love and light to Liz and their family today as he is buried.

And, as he said himself of love; “In this life it is really all that matters”.